Al Qaeda is Coming…

Al Qaeda is coming.  Al Qaeda is coming.  And they have an evil and diabolical plan to destroy our homeland.  It’s absolutely true.  I have seen their secret strategy and plan outlined in careful detail.  They are lining up armies of men, trucks and heavy machinery at the border and they are planning to charge across the frontier and totally devastate our landscape.   In the initial phase of the attack they plan to use massive drills to bore some 18,000 holes a mile or so deep into the earth all around us.    They then plan to take hundreds of millions of gallons of water from our lakes and streams and infuse the water with dangerous poisonous chemicals.    Then, for the cout de grat…..they are going to take the chemically infused water and pump massive quantities of it at great force into the mile deep holes.    Their intention is to shatter the very foundations of the earth beneath us in hopes of releasing the natural gas that is trapped within it.  If they do manage to release the gas, they will collect it for themselves and sell it to the Chinese overseas.   They care not how many lives they ruin or people they kill.  They care not about the devastated landscape they will leave in their wake.  All they care about is getting their evil greedy hands on the natural gas.  We must stop them.  We can’t stand back and let them destroy us.  Come on citizens, take up arms and defend our homeland against this horrific attack planned by EVIL  AL QAEDA.

Oh wait a second.  I made a mistake.  It’s not Al Qaeda that is planning this horrific invasion; it’s the corporate capitalist natural gas companies.    In that case we shouldn’t take up arms and defend our homeland.  Instead we should get down on our knees and beg them for jobs and ask them to give us a tiny percentage of the profit they are going to gain from destroying our environment……

A Concerned Citizen

The Hydrofracked Planet

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